I did it for you, Amitabh... arrgghh!

I'd be the first to say that I believe Bollywood mega-supa-dupastar Amitabh Bachchan's taxes to be in order. If he paid me to, obviously.

But that's just corrupt little old me. It seems that fanatical Bachchan fans don't need to be bribed to come to the defence of their hero's tax status. Especially if they also happen to be supporters of the Samajwadi Party.

The Big B isn't dodging taxes, they say. Of course not. And anyway, even if he is, it doesn't matter how expensive his sunglasses are - the government is only targeting him because he's now allied with the Samajwadi Party instead of his old pals the Congress.

Fair enough, Bachchan-bots. Stand up for what you believe in: The right of a free man to dodge his taxes in peace.

But - call me a crusty old cynic - I do think that offering to commit suicide unless the tax department leaves Bachchan alone is a teeny-weeny bit bonkers.

Not in India, though, where declarations of love and loyalty are considered insincere unless you pull out a gun and suggest that you are willing to blow your own brains out.

To be fair, Sushil Gaekwad and Ishu Sonkar didn't threaten to shoot themselves unless the taxmen backed off. No, no, no. They just suggested that they would set themselves on fire and jump off a water tower.

According to the report, the Allahabad police didn't confront the pair because they were worried it might provoke them to do "something drastic". After three hours they were persuaded to climb down and surrender peacefully to the police. They will now be charged with making a public nuisance.

Would it be heartless of me to suggest that next time we let them burn/fall to their deaths? The human gene pool will be so much better off.

It would? Oh dear.